The Day After the End of the World
by Kagu-tsuchi-13
Summary: When Jade woke up she knew two things: there was a naked girl lying on her chest, and the world had not ended. And looking down at the naked girl on her chest, she really wished that it had.


The second that Jade West's eyes opened she immediately knew that something was wrong. It wasn't that the evil sun appeared to be burning her flesh as if she was one of the undead creatures that she loved to read about. Nor was it the immense throbbing in her head that made her groan in agony. It was something else.

She wanted to rise up and further investigate things but quickly realized that she was immobile. Finding that she could move her neck slightly, she craned it to the best of her ability to see what was immobilizing her.

The source turned out to be a head, covered in long brown locks, that had made him or herself very comfortable in their current position- which just happened to be Jade's naked chest.

Some other things were beginning to come back to her; the most obvious being that she was completely devoid of clothing, as was the person that was using her as a pillow.

But even with her embarrassing predicament, she remained calm:

.

.

.

for about three seconds.

Then, despite the pounding in her head and the painful rays of the sun beating down, she let loose a blood curling scream that could have been heard from the Andromeda Galaxy. It also got a rise out of the person that was sleeping on top of her.

"Five more minutes, mom," the very distinguishable voice of Tori Vega grunted, clearly unaware of what she was using as a pillow.

Of course it was Tori Vega that was lying on her chest. Clearly things weren't bad enough as is. She had to be added to the mix to really fuck things up.

Well Jade very well wasn't just going to lie her and let the girl that she barely tolerated use her chest for such a purpose, even if it did admittedly feel sort of nice. Utilizing every ounce of strength that her slender body possessed, she bucked Tori off of her with the force of an angry bull knocking a rider off it's back.

Either Jade was stronger than she thought, or Tori was even lighter than she appeared to be, because instead of merely falling on the free space of the bed, she was knocked right into the floor, accompanied by a very loud thud.

Within seconds, one Victoria Vega was sitting upright with a very pissed off scowl on her face.

In different circumstances, Jade would have been amused. Tori looked like she was about to speak when Jade beat her to it. "Uh, Vega," she said while attempting to point out that she was in her birthday suit. She didn't know why Tori had not immediately realized this. Did she normally wake up with no clothes on?

Fortunately, Tori picked up on what she was doing and quickly grabbed a stray blanket and wrapped it around her body.

"Wow," Tori said, her anger having been replaced by one of genuine shock.

Quickly covering her own body with another blanket, Jade looked to the woman that had been, well you saw it. She was a bit surprised that Tori was remaining so calm given the embarrassing circumstances.

"Guess the world didn't end after all," Tori went on, a light chuckle accompanying this.

Then it hit her. That was it! The world was supposed to end and clearly it didn't. A few memories came back to her. She vaguely recalled drinking something and then she-. Well, she couldn't remember anything after that.

Jade then looked to Tori, who hadn't made any sort of movement. Without thinking, she spoke up. "Vega."

"Yeah?"

"Kindly get the fuck out of here before I find my scissors and give you a c-section," she threatened, though her voice remained calm. She didn't know why she was so angry at Tori. Even though she couldn't remember much about last night, she did know that Tori didn't rape her or anything of that nature.

"Okie dokie," Tori responded as she walked out the room, not a hint of hostility in her voice.

Once she was sure that Tori was gone and not coming back, she fell back onto the pillow. She held her left hand against her aching head. She would give her and Robbie's souls for a cup of coffee right now.

* * *

Jade eventually realized that she was not going to fall back asleep. After forcing herself to take a shower, she changed into an old sweatshirt and yoga pants. She didn't even know why she owned yoga pants; she had never done yoga or make any attempt to learn.

Too tired to care, she dragged her practically lifeless body down the stairs and made her way into the kitchen, hoping that there was coffee as she didn't feel like driving to Skybucks.

"Coffee is on the counter," a voice said as if reading her mind.

Assuming it was her mom that said it, Jade gave a thank you shrug and traveled to the source. Snatching the nearest cup out of the drainer, she very carefully poured the scalding liquid until it was mostly full. Once that was done, she held her face over the cup, letting the steam hit her. The aroma alone seemed to revitalize her.

"I hope I made it strong enough, I don't know how you normally take it," the voice said again.

Jade found herself rolling her eyes. Her mother had been making her coffee everyday for the past four years and has made it the same ever single time; the one exception being the time that she bought the store brand when she had a coupon. Jade remembered that well as she had dumped the entire canister in the toilet and later claimed a burglar broke in and stole it.

"I made oatmeal if you want some. It is still warm."

"Thanks," Jade muttered as she lifted herself up from her cup. Food did sound nice right now. Grabbing an empty bowl, spoon, and a pot holder, she went over to the stove and carefully lifted the pot by the handle before proceeding to spoon what was left of the mush into her bowl. She didn't particularly care for oatmeal but hunger more than got the best of her.

After picking up her bowl, she was about to ask her mom to make her some bacon when she glanced over at the table and saw that it was not her mother that she had been conversing with this whole time, but Tori Vega, clad in a pair of Beck's old scarlet pajamas.

"Shit," Jade sighed as she picked up her cup and sat down in the closest chair.

"What?" Tori asked as she looked up from the bowl that she had been eating from.

"Everything," Jade sad with a groan. "I feel like shit, I look like shit, and I can barely remember my own name. It's like that stupid Katy Perry song."

"You should drink some water, it will rehydrate you much faster."

"I can't, I will melt like the Wicked Witch," Jade said as she took a sip of her coffee. Not as good as the way her mother made it, but not bad. "She must smell."

"Who?" Tori asked, her voice filled with confusion.

"The Wicked Witch of the West. She can't bathe, it will kill her," Jade explained before taking a much bigger drink.

"Maybe she had some kind of water free body wash. Like hand sanitizer only for the body," Tori offered. "She could get into her giant cauldron and have her flying monkeys rub it all over her."

Jade shuddered, that was not a pleasant image. "Maybe."

Tori didn't respond so Jade started on her breakfast. For the next few minutes the only sounds heard were those of slurping, mostly from Jade.

Finally Tori broke the silence. "I like the new hair style. You kind of look like Quinn."

Jade looked up from her bowl. She must have misheard that, there was no other explanation. "What are you smoking, Vega? Quinn has blonde hair."

"So do you."

Thinking that Tori had gone off the deep end, she licked her spoon and looked into it's reflection. Sure enough, she was looking back at a girl that had golden locks not unlike that of Quinn Fabray.

"What the fuck?!" she screamed, acting as if she had just found out that she was pregnant and Sikowitz was the father. "Did you do this?"

"I don't know, I remember as much as you," came Tori's shaky response.

Jade scanned the girl, looking for any signs of lying. She had watched enough of the Mentalist to know when someone was bullshitting her.

Before Jade could ask any followup questions, she felt her stomach begin to churn. The oatmeal and coffee seemed to be having a battle with whatever was already in her body and whatever was there was winning the fight.

"Oh god, I am going to-."

Jade never got to finish that sentence as without warning, she up-heaved everything that was on her stomach, making a huge, disgusting puddle by her feet.

* * *

When Jade's eyes opened again, she found that her body was covered by a blanket. Raising up, she saw that she was in the den, Tori nowhere to be found.

Managing to get to her feet, she looked around for any signs of Tori Vega. The only clue being a glass of lemon-lime soda sitting on a coaster on the end table next to the couch.

Without notice, she felt a burp come up; it containing the unappealing taste of her earlier sickness. Groaning, she picked up the glass and downed it in a single drink. The cold liquid felt good as it washed over her dry mouth and throat.

Feeling slightly better, she made her way through the house, hoping for some answers. She went through every room twice, even the basement but got no signs of Tori Vega.

Had it not been for the two bowls that were still at the kitchen table, she might have believed that Tori had just been a hallucination brought on by whatever it was that made her wake up feeling like shit.

Shrugging it off, she grabbed her purse, phone, jacket, and keys, then put on her boots. Some fresh air would do her a world of good.

* * *

The whole neighborhood was a mess. Up turned garbage cans, shattered windows, numerous cars that had been broken into. No doubt, a byproduct of the fact that the world was supposed to end yesterday.

Jade had to admit that she was disappointed. At the very least, she hoped that there would be a zombie outbreak like in the video game about the cowboy, or the one about the photographer at the mall, or the woman with the really big tits that raided tombs. Thanks to Beck and his obsessive playing, she would have been more than ready.

She was about to head back home when she caught a glimpse of herself in a shattered window; she looked horrible and not because her normal raven locks were now the color that she despised the most.

Then if dawned on her; she was only slightly miffed over the prospect that she may or may not have had sex with Tori Vega, yet she went fucking insane when she found out that she had blonde hair.

Talk about fucked up priorities.

* * *

As Jade started back, she caught a glimpse of what looked like Tori walking. Curiosity getting the better of her, she called out to the mystery person. "Vega?"

That caught the person's attention and they stopped and turned around. It was Tori! Wow, she must be a slow walker.

Walking as fast as her tired body would allow, Jade caught up to Tori who was now wearing a pair of tights and a sweater with a picture of a reindeer on it. If Tori had a bigger nose she would look an awful lot like a certain Jewish diva right now.

"Hey," Tori greeted. "Sorry I bailed. I figured you would be cranky when you woke up."

Jade found herself snickering at that. "That's a pretty safe bet."

Tori smiled as well. She then looked down, suddenly looking rather nervous. "Hey, uh..do you want to get some food?"

"I could eat," Jade responded without thinking.

"Okay," Tori said, displaying her usual perkiness. Ordinarily Jade found it annoying but admittedly it was a bit cute right now. "Are we going to drive?"

"Let's walk, all those damn holiday goodies have not been kind to my hips."

"I wouldn't say that," Tori responded, moving her head up in down in a way that almost suggested that she was checking her out.

Jade felt her heart start to accelerate; she did her best to calm herself down. There was no chance in hell that Tori Vega would be checking her out. Especially not in the unflattering clothes that she was wearing.

"Let's go," she told Tori as she started off, hoping that these weird feelings were just a byproduct of whatever it was that she had done last night when she believed that she was going to face her untimely end.

* * *

"I figured I would be in Hell by now," Jade told Tori as she took a sip of her diet soda. "I am actually disappointed that the Earth wasn't destroyed in a rain of fire. At the very least you would think that New Jersey could have been knocked off."

"I am glad," Tori said as picked up a french fry from the plate that they were sharing and dipped it in the lake of of ketchup.

"Why, now we have to finish that screenplay for Gradestein," Jade complained while taking notice that Tori always licked the ketchup off with the tip of her tongue before she ate a fry. She had seen Tori eat fries numerous times and never took notice until now.

"I thought you liked writing screenplays?" Tori questioned as she picked up another fry and did the same thing again, this time noticeably slower, almost as if she picked up on Jade's observation.

"Writing is stupid. All that spelling, grammar, making sure you use the right punctuation," Jade said as she leaned back in her side of the booth. "And what is up with semicolons. Do they think that they are better than commas just because they link two sentences together?"

"Beats me, I never did well in English," Tori shrugged. "Back at Sherwood I struggled to keep up a C average."

Sherwood: Tori's old school. Jade knew very little about that place other than Tori's ex, Derek or something, went there. She always wondered about that place.

"What was that place like?"

"Sherwood, it was okay. Not nearly as cool as Hollywood Arts. And it was lacking something."

"A vending machine?"

"Friends like you and the others."

Jade found a smile creeping up. She tried to turn it into a scowl but couldn't. They just had a moment, even if Tori did kind of ruin it by mentioning the goons.

"You are okay too, Vega," she said, feeling a soft and slightly greasy hand grace against her own. Ordinarily, she would have picked up her fork and stabbed it, but she was in too good a mood. Yeah, that was it.

"Would you and your girlfriend like anything else?" the waitress said, having silently creeped up on them, ruining this potential...uh...whatever this was.

Jade was about to correct her, then relented. It didn't look like Tori was going to either. "Uh, no," she said, quickly pulling her hand away from Tori's.

"Yeah, check please," Tori added.

The waitress nodded in response and walked away.

"Wow, she thought we were a couple," Tori said, her voice seemingly indifferent to that tidbit of information.

"Yeah, well you could do worse," Jade said, then realized what she just insinuated. She couldn't believe that she said that of all things. It was almost like she was giving Tori the green light to ask her out. She attempted to think of a follow up statement but found that her normally sharp mind was drawing a blank.

"Pay when you are ready," the waitress said while sticking the bill down on the table. Jade silently thanked her for killing this awkward moment. She had been ready to spill something on herself to give herself a reason to get up and leave.

"Here, I'll pay," Tori offered as she reached for the piece of paper.

"No, I got it," Jade retaliated, trying to snatch it up, only to find that Tori had a firm grasp on it.

"I asked you out."

"This was not a date."

"I ate most of the fries."

"I stole one of your chicken tenders when you weren't looking."

"I saw you take it."

Jade finally had enough. "Let's just split it."

"Okay," Tori agreed, her usual grin instantly reappearing.

Jade found herself smiling a bit as well. The weird feeling that she had been getting started to come back.

"Don't they make a nice couple?"

Jade cocked her head to see the source of who said that. It was revealed to be a middle aged woman sitting in the booth adjacent to her own saying it to whom Jade assumed was her husband.

Jade looked around the small diner for the male and female that the woman was referring to but saw none. The place was pretty empty. In fact, the only two people sitting together were-. Shit! Did everyone think they were a couple?

"Let's get out of here," she said to Tori as she rose up, grabbing a few napkins as she did.

Her stomach was starting to feel upset again, though she knew that this time it wasn't indigestion, even though she wished that it was.

* * *

"So what are we going to watch?" Tori asked as she set the bowl of popcorn down between them.

"Anything that isn't a damn Christmas special," Jade griped as she brought up the guide on screen. "It's the same shit every year."

"I like a few of them," Tori said while stretching her legs. Jade tried her best to keep her eyes on the television screen and not on Tori's calf muscles which were visible through those damn tights.

In a futile attempt to get her mind off of that, she found a station that was playing that old Japanese movie about the murder.

She liked that movie, even if you never did find out what really happened. Points of view were very interesting to her. It was amazing how the exact same story could look so different if you saw it from someone else's eyes.

"This okay?" she asked Tori while pointing to the screen.

"Sure," Tori agreed, scooping up some popcorn with her right hand. "I heard about this, but I never saw it."

"It's pretty good, even though you never find out what happened," Jade started, then realized that she almost spoiled it, "but you can see for yourself."

Seeing Tori nod, she turned to face the screen. Luckily, they had only missed a few minutes of the beginning.

For the next hour, the only sounds heard were from the T..V. with the occasional sound of crunching popcorn or slurping of soda. It was very relaxing.

In fact, it was a bit too relaxing; the longer the movie went on, the more Jade found that she couldn't stay awake. It didn't help that reading subtitles made her sleepy, and she found it harder and harder to keep her eyes open. Finally, she gave in and let them close, only hearing the sound of Japanese dialogue, and soon she drowned that out as well as everything went dark.

* * *

"Do you think the world is going to end in the next five hours?" André asked as he repeatedly checked his phone for the time. "I wonder if the Mayans were going by Pacific time or Central time."

"I'm not worried, remember Harold Camping and the rapture?" Beck pointed out as he leaned back in his chair.

Jade let out a very loud scoff, her way of letting everyone know that she was about to voice her opinion. "The morons do this every few years. They run around like a bunch of chickens with their heads cut off, then nothing happens and try to brush it off. The only good thing that comes out of this is with all the looting going on it's easy to avoid the police."

"What if this turned out to be right though?" Tori asked, having returned from the bathroom and taking her usual sofa position, her skinny body making a small dent in the cushion.

"Just imagine if it was like I am Legend and we were the last hope for humanity," André said, seemingly going off into a daze.

"Vega, Shapiro, and Valentine are our last hope for humanity, looks like humanity is fucked," Jade said as she pulled a cigarette out of the pack that she had been keeping in her bra and lit it up with her trusty lighter that she also kept in her bra.

Tori raised her head up from the couch and turned in Jade's direction. "I wish you wouldn't smoke."

"I wish that your shoulders weren't so bony," Jade retaliated without a second of hesitation, then took another drag of her cigarette just to piss her friend off some more.

"Where is Cat and Robbie anyway?" André asked, having presumably taken notice that they weren't in Tori's living room. Jade was a bit surprised that he didn't notice; they were the two most annoying members of this group. Three if you counted Rex, which Jade didn't.

"Robbie had to go to Temple with his grandmother for Hanukkah " Beck said, flipping his perfect brown curls as he spoke. Jade had to admit, even if they were broken up with no chance in hell of ever getting back together, she would still love to run her fingers through them.

"And I think Cat said something about her brother and tinsel, I wasn't really listening," Tori said with a shrug of her bony shoulders.

Eventually Beck and André left, leaving Jade alone with Tori. She was going to leave as well, had it not been for Tori informing her that her parents and annoying sister had gone away to hit up some outlet mall that promised huge savings and wouldn't be back until tomorrow. For some reason, Jade didn't like the idea of Tori being here alone, end of the world or not.

They had been sitting on the couch, a reasonable distance apart, watching some reruns when Tori suddenly turned to face her.

"Jade, can I tell you something?"

"Yes, those jeans make your thighs look fat," she responded, not breaking away from the commercial with the annoying lizard that kept telling you how you could save money on your car insurance.

"That wasn't what I was going to ask," Tori said, her voice filled with annoyance. "I am scared that the world might actually end tonight."

"You are telling me that you believe all that Mayan shit?" Jade questioned, raising her unkempt eyebrow. She would never admit it, but there was a small part of her that believed it as well.

"Just a little," Tori said, turning away as she spoke. "Wouldn't you hate it if today was your last day and you wasted it?"

"Then why are we sitting here having this stupid conversation?" Jade said as she rose out of her seat and made her way to the front door. "Let's spend these last few hours living it up since we won't be living at all soon."

Tori stood there, looking dazed and out of it. After a few moments of silence, she spoke. "Are you serious?"

"You said yourself this could be our last day," Jade said as she began putting on her boots. "Are you going to spend these last few hours sitting on your ass watching shit that you have seen a bazillion times already?"

"What are we going to do?"

Jade made her way over and put her arm around her friend's neck, something she seldom did. "Anything we want."

* * *

"I can't believe we are doing this," Tori said, acting as giddy as a child. "We really are throwing caution to the wind."

"Oh yeah," Jade said sarcastically. "We are a couple of party animals." Eating churros in the park was not exactly her idea of living it up.

"Come on, Jade. Carbs after seven!" she exclaimed as if they were at a craps table in Vegas.

Jade rose up from the bench and tossed her half eaten churro on the ground, not bothering to aim for the trash can. "Dammit, Vega! I want to do something crazy. Not shit that I could do anytime."

Tori looked slightly taken back by her outburst. Jade admittedly regretted lashing out like that; she still would not take back what she said.

"Well, what do you want to do?" Tori finally asked, her voice practically a whisper.

"Uhh, well?" Jade stuttered, realizing that she had as much of an idea of a wild time as her friend did. There were a few thoughts that crossed her mind, but they were all illegal.

Finally, it came to her. Her mom would no doubt ground her forever, making her seriously hope that they didn't end up in the same afterlife. "Come on," she told Tori as she took off, hoping that her hunch was right.

* * *

It was.

Even during the holidays, there were always a couple of deadbeats that hung around convenience stores, usually trying to bum some coins off of people with respectable jobs. It made executing Jade's plan very easy.

"How did you get them to buy you beer?" Tori asked after they had ran off.

"A couple of twenty something deadbeats with nothing better to do than hang around a gas station, it was like taking candy from an incredibly stupid baby," Jade declared, clutching the paper bag tightly to her body. "I just had to show some cleavage and give them a phone number."

"Why did you give them your number?"

"Who said I gave them my number?" Jade smirked. "I hope those guys need their carpet cleaned."

* * *

"You feel anything?" Jade asked, having just finished her third beer and having tossed the bottle against a tree were it made a satisfying shattering sound.

"I feel queasy," Tori groaned, letting her own bottle drop to the ground.

"At least we got a nice buzz going," Jade said as she struggled to stand. "It makes being around you much more tolerable."

"Ferry vunny," Tori sputtered, Jade taking notice that she seemed much more affected by the beer than herself.

Tori may have been looking ill, but she felt better than ever. She felt like she could confess anything. In fact, this was the perfect chance to tell her friend one of her most repressed secrets. "Hey, Vega."

"Yeah?" Tori grunted in response, continuing to hunch over.

"There is something that I have always wanted to confess to you."

"What is it?" Tori asked, having rose up and turned around so they were eye to eye.

I always admired Quinn Fabray."

"That's not much of a secret. You post about her all the time on your Slap page."

"Yeah, but I admire her blonde hair more than anything," she admitted, surprising even herself at her confession. "I always wanted golden locks like hers."

"But when we wore the blonde wigs for Beck's film you hated it," Tori pointed out while swinging her arms wildly, likely a side effect of the alcohol she had consumed.

"When you are punk-goth you are never allowed to have blonde hair unless you are being ironic," Jade responded casually. That wasn't really true, but even with her beer induced liquid courage, she would never admit that she feared the judgment of her peers.

"Now I now what I want to do," Tori said, grabbing hold of her hand, surprising the hell out of Jade.

Ordinarily, Jade would have flipped her on her back, but the beer had mellowed her out so much that she allowed her friend to drag her off to their next activity.

* * *

"What the?" Jade groaned as she opened her eyes. She had just had the weirdest series of dreams. All of them featuring herself and Tori.

Speaking of, where was Tori? She remembered them going to get hot chocolate. Well Tori got hot chocolate, she got black coffee with a hint of cinnamon.

And after that? Well, she vaguely recalled them coming back to her place, and if she wasn't mistaken, they decided to make popcorn and watch T.V. Everything after that was a blank, she assumed that she got drowsy and passed out.

Speaking of, she found that her eyelids were suddenly very heavy. Maybe she could juts rest her eyes for a moment. All she had to do was keep herself from falling asleep. That would be easy.

As she closed her eyes, she repeatedly told herself to not fall asleep under any circumstances. No matter how soft these cushions were, or how...

* * *

"I like it," Tori said, once they had left the beauty parlor. "Really brings out your eyes."

"Why the hell did I let you talk me into this?" Jade moaned, using the beauty parlor window to view her reflection. The beer having worn off, she was already feeling the regret of this. If the world didn't end tonight, there would be some serious consequences and not to herself.

She never got to hear Tori's response, not that she cared once she saw the sight in front of her. While they had been in the beauty parlor, it appeared that some others decided to spend their last night on earth by littering and loitering. Even now, two males who bore an uncanny resemblance to the two white criminals from the Boondocks were using a trash can to smash the window of a Pear store.

"Can you believe that?" Tori gasped.

"Hey, that store is the real criminal. Have you seen their prices?" Jade said as she watched the two men load up PearPads and Pearbooks onto the back of their pickup.

"Look at all the mayhem going on," Tori went on while turning her head faster than a tennis referee.

"I know, it's awesome," Jade marveled. "I wish I brought my lucky baseball bat."

"We should go home," Tori said, her voice suddenly turning shaky.

"Alright," Jade agreed before spotting something out of the corner of her eye. "After one more stop."

Before Tori could ask questions, she ran to her destination- a liquor store that had been broken into. The floors were lined with shattered bottles and it appeared that the cash register had been forced open.

Shaking that off, she made her way in via the shattered window. She had never had anything harder than beer before and clearly this was a sign from whatever deity was up there for her to try something stronger.

She quickly grabbed the nearest non-damaged bottle and bolted out, silently praying that there wasn't a security camera in there, and made her way back to Tori.

"How did you buy that?" Tori asked, once she had caught back up to her friend.

"Who said I bought it?" Jade responded with a devious grin.

"You stole it!" Tori gasped, making Jade's grin grow even wider.

"Lighten up, Vega," Jade scoffed with amusement. "With all the looting going on I doubt anyone will miss a bottle of-," she stopped to read the label, "Bowman's Rum."

"You stole it!" Tori repeated. "We are going to jail. Did you forget my dad is a cop? I don't look good in orange."

Jade rolled her eyes as she broke the seal on the bottle and pulled the lid off. "Here," she said, handing the bottle to Tori. "You need this more than I do."

Jade was surprised to find that Tori actually took the bottle and even more surprised when she raised the bottle to her lips and took a drink.

"Whew," Tori said, once she had swallowed the substance, her body shaking while she did.

"I'll have what she is having," Jade said, snatching the bottle from her friend's hand. Taking a deep breath, she downed some of the liquid as well. As it went down, Jade learned why they called it hard liquor; it did not go down easy.

They spent the rest of the walk back taking turns drinking from the bottle. It was only a fifth but that was plenty to intoxicate two lightweights enough that by the time that they had made it back to Jade's house and up to Jade's room, they were both a giggling mess.

"Come on, Vega," Jade said as she used her friend's shoulder to balance herself. "We will all be vulture chow soon. This is your last chance to do something you can't normally do."

Jade didn't get a response. Not a worded one anyway. Instead, she got a pair of very soft lips pressed against her own.

Jade found herself blinking, being able to taste a combination of watermelon lip gloss and cheap rum courtesy of the person that was lip locked with her. Her only thought being: Tori Vega is kissing me!

Tori eventually broke away. Jade was so caught off guard by it that she fell backwards, landing ass first onto her mattress; Tori following after, landing on top of her and proceeding to break into a giggling fit.

"V..v...v." Jade mulled, trying to remember the name of the girl that she sometimes liked, sometimes hated, and sometimes made her feel tingly in her lady parts, the third of which she kept to herself.

"That's me!" Tori called out. "Wait, wrong show. I got it, aww, here goes!"

"We are not on T.V., dumbass," Jade snickered as she adjusted the person on top of her so that they were more comfortable.

"Ohhhhhh...well that's good, because I have some very non-PG things that I want to do," Tori said, leaning down at just the right angle to give Jade good view of her purple, sparkly bra.

"Like what?" Jade questioned, finding that her vision was growing more and more blurry by the second.

"Like this," someone that was possibly Tori said. Jade didn't know for sure as she found a familiar pair of lips against her own once again; the key difference being that this time she was kissing back and then some.

"Shit!" Jade groaned, sometime after they had broken apart and Tori was now sucking on her neck.

She had reached the level; she was aware of what she was doing, but not able to stop herself from doing it. Though she had a very strong suspicion that she didn't want to anyway.

"I think that we're over...over..dressed," Jade managed to get out as her hands, which seemed to have developed a mind of their own, began working the buttons on Tori's cardigan.

"I think that you are..riiight," Tori stuttered back as her cold hands began fighting their way into a pair of jeans.

"Here's to the end of the..whateva," Jade grunted, just before Tori's hand made it's way into her jeans and everything went blank.

* * *

Jade could only see darkness when she opened her eyes. She couldn't smell fire or brimstone, so it was doubtful that she was in Hell.

Once her eyes had adjusted a bit, she discovered that she was in the den, the T.V. illuminating some overplayed Christmas special. She attempted to roll on her side, but got a serious sense of déjà vu.

She didn't even need to look down to know what it was that was restricting her movement. How the fuck could this exact scenario happen twice in the same day?

Well, it would be wrong to disturb her, almost inhuman.

And of course, Jade did it anyway.

"Up and at them!" Jade screamed, her voice as high as a Drill Sargent as she once again knocked the sleeping person onto the floor, once again making a satisfying crash sound.

"What the heck?" Tori grumbled, her face plastered into the carpet.

"Wakey, wakey," Jade said with a devilish grin. That almost made her forgot about everything that happened.

Tori slowly rose up, no signs of anger, though she did have a light tread of carpet burn against her perfect cheeks. "Guess we must have fallen asleep."

"Really, I thought we were cyrogenically frozen and woke up in the year 3000," Jade responded sarcastically. "And I was all set to make friends with a purple haired cyclops and smart mouthed robot."

"Is that even still relevant?"

"Yeah, it's not as good as the old ones though."

"Oh, you'll never believe this, but I had the weirdest dream," Tori said, her voice suddenly getting higher.

"What was it?" Jade demanded forcefully. There was no way that Tori could have dreamed that as well.

"I dreamed that you and I went out to spend out last day on Earth together," Tori informed, making Jade nearly choke on her own saliva.

"What did we do, buy shoes and get our toenails painted?" Jade chuckled, trying to hide the beads of sweat that were forming on her forehead.

"No, it was weird. We drank beer, and you told me that you wanted blonde hair, and then you got your hair dyed like it is now, and then you stole a bottle of booze, and we drank it, and then we...well," Tori rambled before coming to an abrupt stop, her face having turned the same color as Rudolph's nose which was conveniently playing on the T.V. behind her.

"It's just a dream, Vega," Jade snapped, a little too quickly and defensively. "I once dreamed that Adam Sandler didn't release two shitty movies a year, and we both know that that dream didn't come true."

"Yeah," Tori responded, her voice containing hints of suspicion. Jade seriously hoped that she didn't believe that those dreams were real, even if there was very good chance that they were.

"Well, you know it is getting late," Jade started, hoping that she would take the hint.

"Oh, well, I will call my parents or Trina," Tori said, it easy to see that she was upset and with good reason.

"You do that," Jade responded as she left the room for no apparent reason. She would offer to drive Tori herself, but she really didn't want to be alone with her in such a small space. There was no telling what might happen.

* * *

"My ride is here," Tori's voice called out from another room.

"Oh," Jade said as she walked into the hallway where Tori was putting on her shoes.

"Hey Jade, are we ever going to acknowledge the fact that we woke up...you know," Tori said before lowering her voice to a whisper, "_naked_."

"Why do we need to acknowledge that?" Jade asked, her voice having changed to what could be perceived as that of an Italian mob boss. "Seeing as that never happened."

"Oh," Tori responded, seemingly indifferent. "I hope you are still coming to my Christmas Eve party."

Jade stopped to think. There wasn't a snowball's chance in Hell that she would spend Christmas Eve with her father and his new family. The last time that happened she deliberately ate a cashew, which she was allergic to, so she could be rushed to the emergency room.

"Maybe, if my schedule opens," she said with a casual shrug, hoping that she didn't look like she was trying too hard.

"Sure thing, Jade," Tori responded, no doubt seeing through the deception. "Well, uh, I guess I will see you later or something."

"Yeah, see you." Jade stood there, wondering if she should say something or do something. Anything would be better than this awkwardness. Too bad she couldn't' think of anything and let Tori leave without so much as a wave goodbye.

As she shut and locked the door, Jade mulled over everything that happened. Outside of kicking Tori in the ovaries, there was no way that this evening could have gone worse.

* * *

Jade could not sleep. The two naps she had played a part, but she knew that the main reason was that her mind was doing more racing than the Daytona 500.

Her earlier dreams kept playing back to her; she could unfortunately remember every fucking detail right down to the dialogue and the color of Tori's bra.

She wondered just how much of what she had dreamed was real. Or if any of it was real. It could just be her subconscious trying to cover up something much worse.

The only things that she knew for certain were: she had blonde hair, this morning she had a terrible headache, and she woke up with Tori Vega on top of her and neither of them had any clothes on when said event happened.

She would like to know for sure what occurred, but outside of getting a time machine or contacting Leonardo DiCaprio, that wasn't possible.

As she closed her eyes for the upteenth time, she found her hand traveling to the inner hem of her pajama pants.

Ordinarily, she would welcome it as it did help her sleep, but she did not want to be doing it when all her thoughts were occupied on Tori Vega, even though it certainly would not be the first time that those two things had crossed paths.

* * *

Come Christmas Eve, Jade did show up at the Vega home, fashionably late in true Jade West style.

She was greeted warmly by the hostess of the soiree, who was clad in yet another reindeer sweater. Jade was starting to think that Tori either needed to go shopping or she liked Lea Michelle way too much.

"Hey Jade," Tori greeted as she practically dragged her inside. "How did you get your hair back to the way it was?"

"It's a wig," Jade muttered so only they could hear. "It'll take at least a week before I can get my hair back to it's rightful color." Jade had almost considered not going for just that reason. Though her mother made her put on one of her costume wigs and get out of the house as according to her, Jade was making her even more depressed than she already was.

"It looks nice," Tori said, sounding sincere. "I think I like regular Jade better than blonde Jade anyway."

"Thanks," Jade muttered in response, a light blush appearing on her cheeks.

"Hey Tor, come do your Zooey Deschanel impression for Melissa," André yelled out, standing next to a dark skinned girl that was presumably Melissa.

"Hey Jade, I got to-."

"Yeah, you are the hostess," Jade finished, doing her best to keep the disappointment out of her voice. It's not like she very well intended to spend the entire evening alone with Tori, especially at Tori's on party.

Once Tori had left to mingle, Jade decided to search for some edible substance. Pushing her way through a crowd of peers, some that she recognized from Hollywood Arts, she made her way to the snack table. The Vegas had gone all out: assorted deli tray, cookies, a huge bowl of mixed nuts, little dishes of pudding, mini-eclairs and cream puffs, those tiny pastries you ate at a tea shop, a huge bowl of red colored liquid that was likely punch, also some eggnog, which Jade doubted had the ingredient that made eggnog drinkable.

"Nice spread," Beck's voice said, snapping her out of her awe.

Cocking her head a bit, she saw that Beck was standing next to her while loading a few things onto his paper plate. "Yeah, I guess."

"I bet you are upset," he went on as he picked up a fork.

"That they don't have the cheese that I like, yeah, but I will live," she responded as she looked at the eclairs, she hoped that no one had already touched them.

"That's not what I mean," he stated firmly as he gestured her away from the table.

Filling up a plastic cup with punch, she grabbed her plate and followed him to the bookcase, one of the few spots that weren't occupied by anyone.

"So what did you mean?" she asked him, though she had a feeling that she already knew what he was talking about.

"The world ending," he said, making her sigh with relief that he wasn't talking about her and a certain someone.

"Oh yeah," she finally said, her voice a bit shaky from what she thought he was talking about. "I never believed it for a second."

"Yeah," he replied, his voice clearly indicating that he believed her as much as she believed herself. "It's a good thing that you didn't believe it, you might have done something stupid, like steal liquor from my uncle's store."

He said that just as she was swallowing some beef and cheese on the little cracker, making her start to choke. Fortunately, he smacked her back until she coughed it up, the chewed up substance landing somewhere in the distance.

"Uh, what do you mean, I was..volunteering at a soup kitchen that night," she gasped nervously once her coughing fit had ended.

"Really, this video would beg to differ," he said, pulling out his PearPhone and displaying a video where true enough, Jade was shown running into the liquor store and snatching a bottle of rum before running back out.

"How did you know?" she finally asked, after several moments of silence. That confirmed that at least one of her dreams were real; why did it have to be that one?

"My uncle has hidden security cameras everywhere. He was watching it as it went down. The only reason he didn't notify the authorities is because he knew we used to date."

"Then why are you showing me this?"

"I care about your well being, Jade," he said as he moved closer to her face. "I would hate myself if I let anything happen to you."

She found herself moving closer to him as well. Though as much as she tried focus on him and his perfect dark locks and piercing brown eyes, all she could think about was a certain skinny brunette who loved to sing at the drop of a hat and made her feel good in ways that another woman shouldn't.

"I can't," she said, pulling away just before their lips could touch. She quickly turned her body around, unable to look her ex in the eyes.

"There is no chance that we are ever getting back together, is there?"

"About as much chance as Taylor Swift has of getting back together with whoever that song was about," she responded, her back still turned.

"You guys would make a good couple."

"Huh?" she said, her body turning around on instinct. He couldn't possibly know.

"Don't give me that BS," he said, his voice raising as he spoke. "I saw the way you were looking at her when you came in. I don't know what happened since we last hung out together, but clearly something changed between you two."

She didn't know what happened between them either, but he wasn't wrong about something changing. Though, it looked like things were back to normal between them. And as soon as school started back, they would go back to the way they were with her making jokes at Tori's expense and Tori shrugging it off with a smile.

Jade thought about lying, but knew it was pointless. Beck knew her better than her own mother. He was the only one she would ever confide in and had her complete trust, which is also how she knew that he would still be there in the morning when they finally did it for the first time.

"So what, it would never work out," she stated firmly, crossing her arms as she did. "Even if we started dating now, we would only be together for a few months before we left for separate colleges. And you saw how the long distance thing worked out for Finchel, Klaine, and Brittana."

"You can't compare yourself to fictional relationships," Beck retailed. "Besides, we know that one of those couples is definitely getting back together, since a certain producer worships the ground they walk on."

He was right, about both things. She couldn't very well assume that her and Tori wouldn't work out, and a certain producer did worship a certain couple. Which reminded her, she hoped that he got the poisonous candy that she sent him.

When she didn't respond, he spoke again. "I hate that I can't be with you. But I hate it even more that you are the one stopping you from being with who you want to be with." He walked away before she could respond, not that she would have.

This would have been an excellent time to make a stealthy exit; she likely would have, had it not been for what she spotted. A decent looking guy was talking to Tori, and she seemed to be enjoying what he said and would let off the occasional giggle. Jade knew for a fact that it was what she did to show that she was interested in a guy.

Jade found her fists clinching on instinct; it looked like Tori had already moved on.

Sighing deeply, she set her plate down and headed to the bathroom. She didn't have to go, but she didn't want to be seen, just in case her eyes started watering.

* * *

She must have been in there longer than she thought, because by the time she had came back to the living room someone had brought out karaoke.

Currently, Cat and Robbie were signing, 'We Are Young'. Jade kind of liked that song, though she liked it more when she thought that Chris Colfer was the one singing it.

She started looking around for any signs of Tori or that asshole that was hitting on her. She saw no signs of him, though she spotted Tori talking to André, Beck, and that girl that André was with.

Part of her wanted to go over there, but she refrained, fearing that she would do something asinine. It was now apparent that things were going to go back to the way they were, whether she liked it or not.

It was weird, but this reminded her of one time a few years ago back when she was grocery shopping with her mom. While picking out breakfast cereal, they ran into one of her mom's school friends. Jade had recognized her from the old yearbook photos that her mom constantly looked through when she drank wine and contemplated where her life went wrong.

Now even though these two were supposedly best friends, they only made small talk before pushing their buggies in separate directions, making no attempt to get together or keep in touch.

If Jade hadn't known better, she would have thought that the two barely knew each other. It made her think that it could one day be her, running into Tori with her three screaming kids that she won custody of after her second divorce. Tori would likely be there with her own two kids and husband; they would talk for a bit, maybe exchange email addresses if email still existed, but never actually message one another. That just wouldn't fly with Jade West.

As if Athena and Aphrodite overtook her body, she bodily pushed through the crowd until she got to her destination.

"Hey, Ve-..To-..Victoria," she stuttered, tripping over her own tongue. She silently kept giving herself pep talks knowing fully well that if she came to her senses she would never be able to go through with what she was about to do.

"Oh, hey Jade," Tori said, turning away from the presumably hilarious conversation that she had been having.

"Uh, could I tell you something over there?" Jade asked, using her body to point to a corner that she had managed, via a few threats, to keep unoccupied.

"Okay," Tori responded, Jade easily being able to tell that she was quite weirded out by her behavior. If she she thought that was bad, she was really going to be in for a shock in a minute.

Jade hated that all these people had to be here, but she very well couldn't wait for everyone to leave as she would no doubt lose the little courage that she had flowing through her.

Shrugging that off, she guided Tori and herself through the small crowd till they were over in the precluded area. She started silently praying that this went off, otherwise she might have to do something far more drastic.

"Okay, we are over here. Why exactly are we over here instead of over there?"

"Because there is no mistletoe over there," Jade stated while pointing above them to said mistletoe.

Tori craned her neck to where Jade was gesturing at. "Yeah, there is, but why did-."

Jade never let her finish that sentence.

Even with her eyes closed, she knew that Tori had to be surprised about what was going on. Who wouldn't be surprised that they were being kissed by Jade West.

Tori seemed to struggle at first, but eventually Jade felt her ease up and even start to kiss back. It was everything that Jade could have ever imagined, much better than the drunken kisses that she shared in her dream that may or may not have actually happened.

"Man, what did you put in that punch?" Jade heard André ask someone, then tuned him and likely the many gasps that she was getting out. At this particular moment, she didn't give a fuck what anyone said; she was kissing Tori Vega and knew that it wasn't because of any mind altering substances.

She would have liked for this to last forever, but as a mere mortal, she still needed oxygen to breathe, forcing her to pull away.

Without making any sort of movement, she scanned the room. The entire place had gone so silent you would have thought that someone was just murdered. Jade managed to scan a few faces: André looked indifferent, Cat, Robbie, Trina, and Tori's parents had completely blank expressions, and Beck had a cheeky smile plastered on his pretty boy face.

Finally, she turned to the one person who's opinion actually mattered to her; the only sound that Tori was making was the light sound of her high pitched breathing.

"I guess the world did end," Tori finally said, being the first one in the room to speak since the ending of the little theatrics display.

Jade looked to her, highly confused. "What do you mean?"

"I mean clearly I have died and went to Heaven."

Jade rolled her eyes, though her smile never left her face. "You are lucky that you are so cute."

"Hmm, then I guess I should get a reward," Tori responded, twinkling her long eyelashes as she did. "For being so cute and all."

"Oh, you will, but hold on," Jade said as she took hold of her wig and pulled it off, earning an assortment of gasps from the room.

"So you are going to embrace being blonde?" Tori asked as she stuck her small hands on Jade's shoulders.

"Fuck no, I just didn't' feel like wearing that anymore," Jade said with a scoff. "Come time school starts my hair will be as black as my soul."

That was the last that she said before she felt Tori's lips against hers. It was clear that Tori wanted to be in control, and Jade allowed her to be. Later, she would be sure to establish that it would not be a regular thing.

"So Jade is blonde and she is macking on Tori? a voice that sounded like Robbie's said. "Did we end up in the Twilight Zone? What's next."

"Hey look, my brother is streaking across the yard," Cat's unmistakable voice yelled out.

Jade could hear the sounds of several footsteps and some rather feminine screaming, likely Cat's brother or Robbie; she really didn't give a fuck.

* * *

Sometime after everyone left, they ended up retreating to Tori's room and locking the door, having assured Tori's parents that their clothes would stay on.

"You know what?" Jade said, once she had tossed her jeans into the hamper and got under the covers, like Tori, only clad in her bra and panties.

"What? Tori asked as she allowed Jade to climb on top of her, to which Jade hoped she would realize was a metaphor for how their relationship would be.

"Even though I am glad that the world didn't end," Jade began as she linked their half naked bodies together, creating far more warmth than their many layers of clothing had, "I am still glad that we had the experience."

Tori didn't respond, with words anyway. But the look that she gave Jade made her know that she felt the same way and nothing else needed to be said. And as she went at it: kissing, touching, occasionally whispering a dirty word in Tori's ear, she found that she was finally at peace.

She didn't know how her friends were going to react once they faced them; she didn't know just how far Tori was willing to go tonight; she didn't know just how much of her dreams were true; she didn't even know if the Mayans were just off by a bit and the world was in fact going to end soon.

And she honestly didn't care.


End file.
